So you've heard about the latest craze sneaking up our noses in the pursuit of a sunless summer glow: tanning nasal sprays. Sounds easy, right? Just a small spritz up the nostrils and you're halfway to a beachy bronze. Well, not so fast, my bronzed wannabes. These cryptic concoctions are riddled with so many red flags, they could guide a sleigh on a foggy night.

The major buzzkill? The main ingredient in these sprays, melanotan II. Despite the fancy name, this isn't a sequel to some blockbuster movie. Instead, it's an illegal substance notorious for its cheeky jazz hands-like side effects. Yes, it revs up your melanin production like no other-but comes with a terrifying variety show of side effects.

Still want to saddle up this wild ride? Hold your (tanned) horses. The melanotan II in these unlawful tanning expeditions hide in a wild-west-like landscape of varying concentrations and impurities, making you a guinea pig in this shady suntan saga.

But surely, our dear friend and watchful guardian, the FDA, has a grasp on this, right? Wrong. The FDA hasn't laid a finger on these concoctions, so you're out there in the wild tanning wilderness all alone. Spooky, huh?

Yes, tanned skin can level up your selfie game like no other, but hun, this isn't the way to do it. You don't need to snort your way to a summer glow. Nowadays, the tanning industry is booming with safer, and let's face it, saner alternatives.

Get your hands on an approved spray tan or self-tanner, armed not with shady substances, but with trusty dihydroxyacetone (DHA). These goodies mingle with your skin's amino acids, gifting you a glow sans scary side effects. Want a quick fix for your night out? Say hello to bronzers-your very own tanning make-up.

Remember, the path to that sun-kissed skin doesn't necessarily have to blitzkrieg through your nostrils. There's always a way to dodge unnecessary risks and still achieve that radiant summer glow. And that, my friends, doesn’t involve indulging in the dangerous game of melanotan roulette.