"Lasik or bust, no more hideous glasses or foreign objects in your eyes"-welcome to the kale-diet of eye care treatments, laser eye surgery! Yes, you got it, it's an extreme move. It reshapes your cornea using very sharp tools- lasers, and I’m not talking about the James Bond kind, but close enough. The concept is simple enough; by tweaking the way your eye’s dome-shaped sassy diva (the cornea) bends light. You can say goodbye to blurry vision.

LASIK, shorthand for "look, no glasses!", just kidding, it's "Laser-Assisted in Situ Keratomileusis," tops the popularity chart of laser eye surgeries. However, it isn't for everyone. No, we aren’t implying a conspiracy. Certain criteria need to be met, like being 18, having a stable vision prescription, and not expecting instant Wolverine-like vision.

LASIK works a treat for sure, but it comes with its own set of disclaimers and side effects like dry eye and fluctuating vision that may last for about a month. Remember, no quick fixes, but it sure beats squinting at the world through four eyes, doesn't it?

For those who failed auditions for LASIK, SMILE (not the facial expression, it stands for Small Incision Lenticule Extraction) can correct myopia or astigmatism. It's like LASIK’s younger sibling who also made it big. SMILE uses a laser to remodel your cornea to focus light rays effectively on the retina. Not quite as catchy as LASIK but it's promising.

Moving to PRK (Photorefractive Keratectomy), sounds like your favorite radio station, but it's actually another cornea-reshaping contender. It's the safer bet for those with dry eyes or thin corneas. It's kind of the ophthalmology's underdog-less flashy than LASIK yet surprisingly effective.

With LASEK (Laser-Assisted Sub-Epithelial Keratectomy), we've got yet another laser eye surgery variation. It's like LASIK and PRK's forgotten cousin. The surgeon performs some corneal cell origami instead of removing this tissue altogether. LASEK specializes in treating refractive errors if you have an extremely high prescription or paper-thin corneas.

Reality check: The results of laser eye surgery are permanent, yet it ain’t magically freeze your vision in time. Post-surgery, you may still need glasses for tasks like hmm.. reading. Aging and other issues like cataracts and presbyopia (what makes reading a nightmare as you age) can still affect you.

Often, insurance companies play blind deaf to covering laser eye surgery, dismissing it as 'elective'. This means pulling an average LASIK bill of around $4,400 from your pocket, not exactly spare change. There's a silver lining though; the expense might seem less terrifying compared to years of glasses or contacts expenses.

Speaking with an eye doctor is like the last level in this laser eye surgery game. They’ll weigh in on factors determining whether you ready for the big leap. One thing's clear, laser eye surgery, much like kale, isn't for everyone.